Knowing Which Way to Go

I have struggled to make decisions my entire life. When I was not sure what to do about something, others would say, “Follow your heart” and my reply would be, “I can’t hear my heart.” I have done rock, paper, scissors over the phone with my mom to make decisions. You get the idea; I am not a fan of decisions. One could ask how I made the decision to get married. One glance at my husband and you will see it was a very easy decision. Ha!

As you may know by now, my husband and I have been dealing with unexplained infertility for over 2.5 years. We were close (I mean days away) from starting IVF treatment November 2017. Our doctor thought they found a polyp and advised us to come back in a few weeks to see if it was still there. We were crushed. I just had one removed in February of the same year. How could another one have formed so quickly? We followed the doctors’ orders and came back and thankfully, they could not find anything on the ultrasound. By this time, the clinic was shutting down for their end of the year lab cleaning, etc., so it was too late for us to start any IVF treatments.

In the meantime, very randomly, but not so because I know God’s hand was in this, we learned about FertilityCare, another treatment option to assist in getting pregnant. Crazy story I will save for another post… the suspense! We had never heard of FertilityCare but liked their approach of finding out WHY we were not getting pregnant versus overriding my body to possibly get pregnant. Note: Either approach is good. What is important is that you are comfortable with what you are doing. FertilityCare involves charting your cervical mucus (such an attractive word) throughout your cycle to check for any abnormalities happening with your hormones during that time. It is a longer and slower process. Two words no women having difficulties getting pregnant ever wants to hear because Every. Month. Counts. Here is where I am going with this. Making the decision to switch treatment plans was hard. We had to send all our medical records to a new clinic, make more phone calls, deal with a completely new set of unknowns due to our unfamiliarity with the treatment plan, etc.  It felt like we were starting over and I feared wasting precious months I felt we did not have.

During this time, my husband was praying, “We are listening God, speak to us.” The beautiful part of it all is that both my husband and I felt at peace about this decision. We felt at peace about this decision because of God speaking to us; not because we are pregnant or that we will even be able to get pregnant with this treatment option. Peace is not dependent on your wait being fulfilled. I wanted to share this because knowing which way to go is difficult and looks different for each person. There is no one size fits all, even though the leggings I am wearing say that on the tag. With so many options and choices, making a decision is overwhelming. Be encouraged to know your path will not be the same as mine. God will guide and reveal his direction for you. He has our best interest as heart (which ultimately is bringing Him glory and strengthening our relationship with Him, NOT getting what you want every time you want it). If you are interested in learning more about FertilityCare view the links or contact me.

Disclaimer: The information provided above are my thoughts, opinions and experiences and should not be taken as medical advice or a substitute for medical care. 

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