The Wait List – Kim

The Wait List features guest posts from people just like you and me, all sharing a coming thread of you guessed it, waiting. No one wants to be on the wait list, but through these features, I hope you find encouragement and see all the miraculous ways God works through us during that time. If you are interested in sharing your story on The Wait List, please contact me.

Guest post written by Kim.

What one thing were you waiting for?
About one year after my husband and I got married, we decided we were ready to start a family! Becoming a mom was something I had dreamed about since I was a young girl, so I couldn’t wait for this next life phase!

God had placed a huge desire in my heart to be a mom. I have always loved kids and babysat every chance I got, worked in a daycare, and LOVED being an aunt and godmother. I couldn’t believe it was going to finally be my chance to be called MOM!

Little did I know, it would be a very stressful and trying life phase, and not all smiles and joy as I had imagined. It did not come as quickly as I was hoping. My wait for holding a baby of my very own was 2 years. Looking back, it doesn’t sound that long, but having my reminder come right on time every month made those 2 years seem like 10!

How did God help you in your wait? How did you continue to live in the wait?
During our two year journey to becoming parents, we lost our first baby. At 11 weeks of pregnancy, I had a miscarriage and was torn apart. I couldn’t imagine why God had created me with such a huge desire to be a mom but then took my baby from me.

During this time and for the next 1.5 years until we finally got to hold our rainbow baby Jaxen James, God sent SO MANY amazing friends our way. I became friends with and was surrounded by so many women that had experienced miscarriage and infertility themselves. I felt so loved and supported and never felt alone. God knew we needed a strong support system and showed me the importance of a strong Christian community to experience life with!

Now that I know the importance of support during these trials of life, God has given me the desire to be there for other women in the midst of them too!

Was what you were waiting for received?
Two years after we decided to become parents, we gave birth to our healthy, bouncy baby boy, Jaxen James! I will never ever forget those first moments when my son was laid on my chest, looked up into my eyes, and placed his hand on my chin. In that very moment, I knew everything we had gone through was worth it. He was worth the wait.

Countless times over the past 2.5 years while rocking my son to sleep, watching him play ball with my husband, or when I pick him up from daycare and he yells, “Mommy” and comes sprinting into my arms, I get tears in my eyes feeling so so thankful that God has given him to me.

In fact, waiting these two years have made me more aware of just how much I wanted to be a mom and how much I desire to be home more with my family. I didn’t go through all the heartache and struggle only to hand my son off to someone else 5 days a week!

This has led me to pursue another passion of mine and become an online health and fitness coach with the goal of being able to be home more! I want nothing more than to be able to have more pool and park dates, do mommy & me classes together, and someday help with school field trips and activities!

If I would not have struggled for so long in the journey to becoming a mom and not realized just how precious this gift is, I may never have been led to coaching which has filled holes in my life I didn’t know even existed! I know God has me right where He wants me, and I know His plan to get me here was just what was needed.

What advice would you give to someone else who is in the waiting?
First of all, I would say to always live a life of gratitude to God for all he has given you! This can be so hard when the thing you desire most, you don’t have! It is our tendency to focus on our struggles and what we don’t have that we want so badly!

Every morning before I get out of bed, I think of 3 things or people I have in my life that I am grateful for and why. This helps me start the day with a positive, grateful mindset instead of immediately focusing on my problems and struggles. I truly believe changing your mindset can change your life. Even if it doesn’t change your current situation, it can completely change your attitude!

Second, I would say to keep in mind that this struggle and wait that you are in is part of your story! God may be using this period of waiting to teach you or prepare you for something bigger then you can even imagine!

“Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us” Ephesians 3:20.

Please pass this message along to anyone you know who could use some encouragement in the wait, had a miscarriage or are going through infertility.

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